A sarcastic persuasive paragraph, (A Modest Proposal)?

First, tell your teacher or professor to let you form your own opinions. Second, the paragraph is good, but the sarcasm is too obvious, which makes it kind of flat feeling. I think you should do the reverse, and focus on a sarcastic admission of US superiority rather than Canada's inferiority. Try something like this: "The US is obviously superior to Canada. They have bigger guns, bigger wars, bigger prisons, and even bigger trash..." Something like that anyway(not good writing but just an example of potent sarcasm). But in the spirit of A Modest Proposal, I think you should make a sarcastic proposal about something dramatic Canada should do to become as great as America, like get into more wars and pay mercenaries so you can save money on troop costs, etc.